As Carleton University’s independent student-led publication, the Charlatan has covered thousands of news stories over 80 years of publishing.
While the news section has published local, national and international issues of historical significance, it has also reported on many stories featuring baffling, silly and downright random events.
As a look back on this paper’s legacy of coverage over 80 years, the Charlatan flipped open its archives to spotlight one wacky headline from each decade the paper has been publishing.
From the 1940s to now, here are the nine wildest headlines that have topped the Charlatan’s pages.
1940s: We Almost Lost Drewery, Bashes Noggin on Plane
This story made the front page of the paper on Oct. 25, 1949, when this university’s newspaper was still named the Carleton.
Chronicled is the story of fourth-year journalism student Johnny Drewery, who smacked his head on the wing strut of an airplane while jumping out of it for a 40-cent bet made with a university staff member.
Drewery was in free-fall for several hundred feet, the article reports, before his parachute opened and he completed the 2,000-foot descent safely.
When later asked about his condition, Drewery reportedly said that he only had a “throbbing headache,” which he said was “the customary state of a journalism student.”
1950s: Winter Queen Kidnapped: Sir George College Students Accused of Capturing Cute Carleton Co-Ed, Patsy Bates
This article from the Feb. 20, 1959 paper reports the kidnapping of Patsy Bates, who was the Carleton Winter Weekend Queen and a reporter for the Carleton.
Bates was reportedly taken by four students from Sir George Williams College, a Montreal school that merged to create Concordia University in 1974.
Authorities found a note from the students that said Bates was being taken to be “wined and dined in Montreal” for the McGill University Winter Weekend. The note also promised to return her the day after to ensure she could attend a sports match between the Georgians and the Ravens.
The kidnapping was a form of retaliation, investigators determined, for Sir George’s recent basketball loss to Carleton. Besides being the Carleton queen, Bates was also targeted because of her position as a reporter in a time of plagiarism disputes between the Carleton and Sir George’s student newspaper, investigators said.
1960s: Exchange Students Find Carleton Men ‘Immature’
There was tough criticism for Carleton from three Canadian exchange students in this article published on Oct. 11, 1963.
Carleton men took the brunt of it, being described as “immature and unappealing intellectually,” by the two women participating in the exchange program.
On the other hand, Carleton women were “90 per cent good looking,” though it was a culture shock to see them wearing shorts in class, according to the man on exchange.
Overall, the three exchange students’ first impression was that Carleton folks were poorly dressed, the report says, and that the school lacked broad educational offerings and interest in student government.
The tunnels, the quad and the campus’ location next to the canal received praise, the article reports.
1970s: Rotting mouse found in beer
“Pretty raunchy” was how a first-year Carleton student described the taste of the beer she was sipping, which contained the decayed remains of a mouse at the bottom of the bottle, in this Nov. 10, 1972 article.
The mouse was likely killed by a mouse trap and stuffed inside the beer bottle, according to Carleton’s biology department, which investigated the issue. Though the bottle was washed, the skeleton of the mouse remained in the bottle and was embalmed by the beer, the article reports.
The student would likely receive lots of beer as compensation, the report says.
1980s: The Sultans of Snooze
Published on June 25, 1981, this article pulled back the curtain on one of Carleton’s sleepiest experiments — literally. Deep in the chilly basement of the Loeb building, human test subjects had electrodes taped to their heads and were tucked into an echo-free room to have their sleep patterns studied.
“It’s like a meat cooler,” a test subject said.
Nights in the bottom of the Loeb building weren’t exactly restful as people would be woken up three times over the course of the night so researchers could document their sleep patterns.
1990s: CUSA lures voters to polls with free European vacation
One lucky student who voted in the Carleton University Students’ Association (CUSA) election would win a week-long vacation to Europe, this Jan. 23, 1997 story reports.
The initiative was presented to combat low voter turnout, the association’s chief electoral officer said.
The winning student, randomly selected from the list of voters, would embark on a one-week tour of four Western European countries, with stops in London, Amsterdam and France, the article reports.
The vacation, paid for by a partnership with a travel agency, was worth $1,290 at the time — which is the equivalent of around $2,340 today.
2000s: Bread project goes awry
A plastic bag containing a mysterious substance was found outside the Mackenzie building prompting Ottawa police’s explosives unit to descend on campus, according to an Oct. 14, 2004 article.
The unknown substance turned out to be nothing more than sugar and flour, ingredients an engineering student had left behind overnight. The bag was part of a class project challenging students to design the best solar-powered oven.
Officials grew more confident the powder wasn’t dangerous after a squirrel began eating it early in the investigation with no side effects. Still, a professor who discovered the bag and two security guards were quarantined as tests were done on the substance.
An aerospace engineering student eventually came forward later in the day and fessed up to mistakenly leaving the bag on campus.
2010s: Fight against potential U-Pass increase ramps up
And just like that, we’re into the Charlatan’s digital age.
On Halloween in 2011, a horde of student protestors donned zombie costumes to fight back against a proposed OC Transpo U-Pass fare hike, with bloody tombstones in hand to bemoan “the death of affordable transit.”
Students “can’t even get onto buses because they are overcrowded,” CUSA vice-president (student issues) Chantle Beeso said at the time.
Fourteen years later, it doesn’t feel like cheap and reliable bus service has come back from the dead.
2020s: CASG finds $6,000 misplaced cheque, amends budget
The council for the Carleton Academic Student Government majorly increased its 2019-2020 budget after discovering a misplaced cheque, this Jan. 21, 2020 article reports.
The CASG president discovered the $6,248 cheque in the organization’s mailroom, the report says, which allowed the council to roll back budget cuts made due to the missing surplus.
In April 2020, the Charlatan’s news editors published a series of memes referencing some of the top stories covered that academic year, including the following image.
Featured image by Maia Tustonic/the Charlatan
