Thinking of giving a green gown?
“Sex is a Texas drought,” the Bloodhound Gang say.
Last month, a couple in Tennessee was caught copping a feel, copperfield-style. The couple was arrested and a court date was scheduled for June 3.
A similar situation happened in Florida recently, with the participants being arrested as well.
It might be easy getting hot and bothered on a cool night in a warm state, but as the summer months start sizzling southern Ontario, many Ottawa residents may feel inclined to public woohoo as well.
Believe it or not, it’s not technically illegal to smash pissers in public here.
While there is no specific law about beating around the bush in Canada, if you “do it” in a public area where people might hear or even see you, you could be charged under section 173 of Canada’s Criminal Code with committing an indecent act.
So, it might be more slammer time, less hammer time for you if you’re not careful.
And yet oddly enough, it’s actually illegal to eat ice cream on Bank Street on a Sunday. So, I guess you kids behave yourself and go loco down in Acapulco.
Now, there is actual evidence to support the invigorating feeling of being outdoors and in nature. A well-known biogeographer, E. O. Wilson, coined the term “biophilia” to refer to human proclivities towards the great outdoors.
To be honest, I’m slightly (really) curious to see how someone studies whether or not getting jiggy with it in the jungle is any different.
Vice published an opinion piece called “The Thrill of Having Sex Outdoors Is Actually Better Than The Sex Itself,” with a personal anecdote from the writer. So obviously, it must be true.
However, if you do want to rock the boat, one of the most popular places for Canadians to do it is in a canoe. According to a survey by Playtex and Environics Research Group, 8 per cent of Canadians report having had sex in a canoe.
Not feeling creative? Thankfully, Jesus invented Reddit, on which there is a myriad of fun scenarios to choose from such as park, woods, fields, fire escape and “pools/rivers/lagoons.”
But before cavorting into a full-on bacchanal in the Canadian wilderness, you might first consider doing it on private property, such as on a porch or balcony. That way, you get the thrill of the outdoors, without as much of the risk.
Suffice to say, you can really get buck-wild.
Photo by Tim Austen
