“You will get Chlamydia . . . and die.”
Coach Carr managed to accurately sum up the sex ed classes I had during my time at a run-of-the-mill conservative Catholic high school.
I learned the proper names for both sexual anatomy and sexually transmitted diseases—I mean, infections—from sterile diagrams and gruesome pictures that looked more akin to The Creature of the Black Lagoon than to someone’s genitals.
I’d already taken my education into my own hands (through a heavy dose of experimentation and Wikipedia) by the time my parents dropped me off in my tiny 8×4 ft. res room.
In fact, I was delighted to find some shiny square wrappers in my goodie bag, and figured that if anything happened over the coming week, I would be duly prepared.
How wrong I was.
I was stoned or drunk at every frosh event I went to, a hot sweaty mess caught up in the chaos of booze-fuelled meet and greets.
I was having the time of my life, away from my parents, from rules or curfews, and it turned out that safe sex wasnít as high of a priority as I would have hoped.
Two years, three pap tests, and one pregnancy test later, I am elated that my actions never gave me anything worse than a killer hangover.
However, those scares taught me far more than any festering organs displayed on a poster board ever could have.
It could have been me when my friend was diagnosed with genital herpes.
Human papillomavirus (HPV), herpes, chlamydia, and gonorrhoea are Canada’s most prevalent STIs and they each come with their own unique calling card.
Some strains of HPV can lead to cervical cancer, and herpes sticks around for life. Gonorrhoea, or the clap, presents itself as burning while urinating for men, while chlamydia in women can lead to infertility, chronic pelvic pain, and complications in pregnancies.
It’s equally important to know that many cases of STIs don’t present any visible symptoms, so even if your partners look clean, it doesnít necessarily mean they will be.
Condoms are the only method of contraception that will also protect against the transmission of viruses or bacteria.
The sense of community and freedom that comes along with living in residence or participating in frosh events can never be exactly duplicated—just imagine summer camp on steroids.
But it can be an overwhelming experience too, especially for people coming in with questions regarding their faith or sexuality.
You’re going to meet a lot of people, so try to remember that the ones who pressure you to do something you’re truly uncomfortable with probably arenít the ones that you want as your new best friends.
First year is going to be crazy and emotional and scary and completely exhilarating, sometimes all at once.
Itís the beginning of your adult life, and with all that freedom, comes responsibility. Having sex with a condom might not be the most fun, but neither is wiping baby puke out of your hair.
