Re: “Feminism has put men on eggshells,” March 8, 2013
The dialogue I was hoping to start with my previous submission was unfortunately unsuccessful.
Instead of raising awareness of “how Feminism can affect men’s issues” the subject became “feminism and dating.” The example of dating was initially chosen to be a relatable metonymy but regrettably was understood as the object of the letter itself. The tone as well, on further reading, was a little strong and insensitive for this delicate issue which many people carry close to their hearts.
In spite of these short comings and after proving myself to be the wrong person for the job, I believe that my intended subject still warrants the proper attention. Therefore, I will give this opinion one more attempt and hopefully better communicate my message.
The word feminism itself is a charged word and has different meanings for different people, so it may be useful to define the term for this discussion. The word feminism has two different formal definitions which easily become confused. The first definition (which we will denote with a small “f”) is the belief in political, social and economic equality of the sexes. The second definition (which we will denote with a capital “F”) is the woman’s movement, composed of a series of social campaigns to reform society.
In the previous letter, I was trying to allude to the problems men are facing. In this editorial, I will briefly list some of them in a straightforward and linear fashion.
In post secondary education, young men’s enrollment rates have been declining steadily since the 1960s. According to the New York Times, 40 per cent of all present-day university and college undergraduates are men.
Often, men who decide to opt out of post secondary education and go into the work force traditionally choose to work in either the construction, manufacturing or farming sectors. All of which were most affected by the recent recession.
This trend means that many men are no longer able to identify with a masculine identity through their work or by being the family breadwinner. Unable to live up to the dated archetype of their sex, men have begun to question their self worth and search for new pursuits to fill their empty identities in order to provide some meaning in their lives.
Sadly, few men ask for help because doing so would create further feelings of self-loathing. Asking for help is seen as “unmanly’ for many young men since it would go contrary to the pervasive western cultural definition of a man, modeled after the ‘strong, silent type’.
Therefore, many young men unfortunately end up turning to extended adolescence or bro-culture, consumerism, and/or womanizing. All of which lead to further feelings of emptiness and further disorientation.
The belief in feminism did not create this state of affairs for men. In fact, it would be wise for men to learn a few lessons from their Feminist counterparts. Such as the ability to organize, communicate, start support groups and social campaigns.
The relative success of the woman’s movement has however, inadvertently contributed to the problematic state of affairs of men and masculinity by focusing society’s attention primarily on woman’s issues.
Therefore, the struggles of today’s men in relation to Feminism are not due to the fight against patriarchy, but instead to the social neglect of modern day men’s issues. This neglect can be seen manifesting itself through a lack of a solid, modern and healthy male cultural archetypes. Furthermore, this is exacerbated by a lack of positive role models at home and in the community, lack of brotherly support groups for men enduring troublesome periods, as well as a lack of social appreciation for masculine and manly virtues.
In closing, I would like to say that I am a feminist. I believe in political, social, and economic equality of the sexes. I also support Feminism in it’s attempt to bring about positive social change. At the same time, I believe that the well being of men and men’s issues should no longer be overshadowed nor neglected while we try to bring about equality for women.
Note: These views and opinions are my own and I welcome your thoughts and criticisms. However, all thoughts and criticisms should be directed towards me and not to my family nor the department of civil engineering.
— Marc Yegani,
third-year civil engineering
