Open up your Snapchat, take off your clothes, take a picture . . . pause for a second as you double and triple check the name before you hit send. Breathe a little sigh of relief when you refresh the page and see the picture sent to the right person.
Congratulations! You’ve just sent a nude photo. Now the question is: who’s going to see it?
If you’re lucky, just the person you sent it to. They opened the photo, took a peek, and let it fade away. If you sent it via text, they deleted it.
Or, if you’re like a lot of young adults, that picture got shared. You’re left feeling violated and distrustful, but somehow people are asking you why you took the photo in the first place.
Nude photos are an amazing way to share and appreciate your body. However you identify, sending bare-all photos to your partner is a fun way to make yourselves closer, as well as turned on. Bodies are beautiful and sexy. So is yours. Take a photo and send away.
But no one is immune to the criticisms of nudes that come up all the time.
Many celebrities, including Jennifer Lawrence and Kate Upton had their nude photos distributed on 4chan last month after their phones were hacked. Chances are you heard at least one person say they shouldn’t have taken the photos if they didn’t want them shared.
Unfortunately, this idea is a lot more common than it should be and it plagues the discussion surrounding nude photos. The problem is not with the people in the photos, but with the people who shared them.
Sending a nude photo is a gesture of trust. Bodies are wrongly and unduly sexualized in our society, so that nude photo you just got represents a huge amount of trust: they will share their body with you, in exchange for you keeping it in confidence.
When a nude photo is shared, that trust is broken. By and large the responses to nude photos are that the person is a “slut/whore/bitch” for having explicit photos of themselves. But why is it that they are blamed for something that isn’t their fault?
Too often, nude photos are shared with the public without the knowledge or consent of the person in the photos. That photo was taken—and shared in confidence—so why are we punishing the person whose trust was broken, rather than the person who broke it?
To help with what I know is a confusing a difficult choice for some people to make, I’ve compiled some guidelines on whether or not you should look at nude photos.
The question is simple: were the photos sent to you with the non-coerced consent and knowledge of the person in the photos?
- Yes? Go ahead and look at the photos! Awesome. Someone trusted you enough to send you a photo. Cool stuff. I bet they’re hot.
- No? Don’t look at that photo. It’s a complete and utter violation. To quote Lena Dunham after the recent celebrity photo hack, via Twitter: “Remember, when you look at these photos you are violating these women again and again.” That person already had their trust broken. Don’t be another part of the problem.
People should always feel free to make empowered decisions about their bodies and who gets to see them. It’s time we stop shaming people for the choices they make and start shaming the people who violate their privacy and trust.
Nude photos being shared without consent is a threat—and if you don’t see the problem with that, you need to reconsider your understanding of respect and consent. It’s just not your Snapchat to share.
