My phone alarm rings at 5 a.m. I fumble in the dark for the snooze button. Swaddled in a thick blanket, I log onto my laptop, my brain still foggy as I do the 10-hour conversion between Eastern Standard and Indian Standard Time in my head. The early morning silence adds to my DIY movie theatre experience as bleary-eyed and half asleep, I join other first-year journalism students for our virtual Halloween movie ‘night.’
Watching Coraline to the sound of birds chirping may not have been the wild college experience I had imagined, but as an international student at Carleton, it has definitely been a unique one. I would have loved to be on campus to experience Ottawa’s riverside views and infamous weather in person. However, due to the ongoing pandemic, I decided to remain in my home country for my first year of university.
Even if I was able to travel to Canada, fears of international flights being cancelled due to rising COVID-19 cases—as well as being alone in quarantine during my first two weeks in a new country—would have left me an anxious mess in residence.
I’ve been homebound under lockdown for the past nine months, so for me, even virtual university was an escape from being cooped up indoors 24-7. That’s why, despite the drastic time zone difference, I was overly optimistic during my first semester as I kept myself busy with late night classes, social society events, and article deadlines.
Morning classes in Canada were evening classes for me, but the thought of switching to Canadian time was never an option for me. Being awake, knowing it is dark outside and that everyone else is fast asleep would not have motivated me, as someone who values her much-needed beauty sleep.
Due to my intense fear of missing out, I never let time get in the way of an incredible opportunity. I applied for a variety of positions and involved myself in many online social groups. I was always awake at ungodly hours, messaging my peers, conducting interviews and organizing events, but I always went back to sleep happy, knowing I was making friends despite the distance.
The exhaustion hit me hard on week five. I knew the habits in my current lifestyle weren’t healthy. By barely being able to stay awake during lectures or by being fuzzy-brained during timed quizzes, I realized that it was also affecting my grades. I felt just as tired getting up as I felt going to bed, and I was both mentally and physically spent.
I wouldn’t have made it through the following weeks without an amazing support system, both at home and in Canada. My high school friends, who are also international students in a similar situation, were like lifelines. By sharing our time management tips and being just one call away when the stress of our online university experience overwhelmed us, I consider myself incredibly lucky to have them by my side, even though I haven’t been able to see them since schools closed due to lockdown nine months ago.
The friends I’ve made and the people I’ve met so far in all of my classes have been incredibly understanding of the time zone difference. I once mentioned during one of our informal Zoom calls that I didn’t want to be known as the “international student” and that I was willing to work to their schedule, irrespective of IST. They immediately protested, more concerned about me getting a good night’s sleep than I was. Meetings and events are now hosted later in the evening, keeping my time zone in mind, and I’m so grateful to be surrounded by a great class in these taxing times.
My professors have also been understanding of the situation, especially by providing alternative resources when I’ve had difficulty accessing unavailable textbooks, Canadian newspapers or location-based websites.
I’ve publicly talked about my experience with Robyn Bresnahan on CBC Radio’s Ottawa Morning both at the start of the fall semester and during the eighth week. Listening to both interviews, there is a stark difference between my optimistic self in September versus my realistic self in October as I mention my slim chance of reaching Canada by summer 2021.
Yet, my version of a “study abroad” experience has made me realize that attending university from a different country is doable if you’re mentally prepared for it and if you have the emotional support of friends and family.
Featured graphic by Sara Mizannojehdehi.
