Everyone wants to feel wanted. Everyone wants to feel accepted. Everyone wants to be loved. As humans, we crave the intense feeling of affection. Little do we know that it has to come from within.
When you look in the mirror what do you see? Do you pick out things that you hate and would change? Or do you see something beautiful, something you love every inch of and would not change for the world? Most people would say they despise their reflection in the mirror and can pick out all of their flaws.
We are taught that falling in love is everything. There are chemicals in our brain that show love is literally like a drug. Once we become hooked, we dedicate our lives to that person in hopes of getting another dose of this addictive love drug.
The problem with relying on other people is that they can let you down. They can love someone else. You can make them your top priority and you can be low down on their list.
This problem has been occurring for hundreds of years. From the tragedy of Romeo and Juliet to modern-day heartbreak around us, there is an ugly side of love that hurts to explore.
But what if there was a solution to this never-ending problem? What if there was one person you could love who won’t let you down? This one person is someone you have to love before you can be with anyone else.
The absolute most important person to love is yourself. That’s right-you. You are more than good enough.
Why? Because how can you accept true love if you don’t even love yourself? How can you give your heart to someone else when you don’t love your own heart in the first place?
Louise May is one of the founders of the self-help movement. She has written bestsellers that have been introduced to people in 33 countries and translated into 25 different languages.
May believes that it is not selfish to love ourselves. She says, “It clears us so that we can love ourselves enough to love other people.” She says that love is a deep appreciation for ourselves.
Oftentimes, we are very critical of ourselves. May stresses that it is important to accept all the different parts of ourselves, even things that we might find embarrassing or something we aren’t good at. It takes time to accept our own flaws but this is something to work on in order to love all parts of yourself.
At the end of the day, when you strip everything away you only have one thing and that is yourself. If you aren’t comfortable with that, then are you really comfortable with anything?
You can love yourself in a variety of ways. You can treat yourself to an afternoon of watching your favourite TV show or going for a run or reading a wonderful book. You can push your limits by trying something new and getting out of your comfort zone. You can challenge yourself to think about the direction of your life and if you are headed the way that you want to go. You can let yourself dream and laugh and love.
When you neglect to love yourself, you are only hurting one person and that is you. By not taking care of yourself and having me time, you risk not getting to know the most important person in your life—you.
Self-care is essential to loving yourself. Whether it is sharing a cup of coffee with a beloved friend or dancing in the rain, whatever it takes to make you feel good is crucial to your well-being.
As said in the book The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky, “We accept the love we think we deserve.” If you do not love yourself, you will not believe that you deserve the best possible love there is.
Whether you believe it right now or not, you really do deserve love, so go ahead and work on loving yourself.
